Thursday, December 22, 2016

A Very Micah Christmas 2016

Shepherds, why this jubilee? Because I *finally* finished my annual Christmas mix! It's been an especially physically, emotionally, and spiritually draining season working at the Monolithic Online Retailer, but I still managed to put together some songs for your Yuletide enjoyment. At least I got it out there before Festivus.

This year you'll be grooving to:
1. "I Walk So Slow Under the Mistletoe" - Walter Martin & Kat Edmonson
2. "Christmas Sweaters" - Noah Glenn
3. "Holiday Road" - Tennis
4. "All I Want Is Truth (For Christmas)" - The Mynabirds
5. "Baby, It's Cold Outside" - Savoir Adore
6. "O Come All Ye Faithful" - Weezer
7. "Silver Bells" - She & Him
8. "A Willie Nice Christmas" - Kacey Musgraves with Willie Nelson
9. "Stay In" - Army Navy
10. "Christmas Clown" - The Rosebuds
11. "I'll Be Home on Christmas Day" - Elvis Presley
12. "The 12 Days of Christmas" - Straight No Chaser
13. "Fairytale of New York" - Clive Murray
14. "Christmas Is Holy" - John Wesley Harding
15. "O Holy Night" - Katie Melua
16. "White Winter Hymnal" - Birdy
17. "O Little Town of Bethlehem" - Kyle Cox
18. "A Snowflake Fell (And It Felt Like a Kiss)" - Glasvegas
19. "Stille Nache, Heilige Nacht" - Vienna Boys' Choir
20. "Joy to the World" - Eef Barzelay

You can snag it here.

However, I realize that streaming is the cool, hip thing to do, so I give to you the mix in Spotify playlist form:

Note: the playlist is missing three or four songs from the downloadable version, so you won't be getting the full AVMC experience. Such is life.

Okay, this worker elf is off to bed. I hope you like the mix. Merry Christmas!

MILF on the Shelf: Day 9

Winner winner Lee's Famous Recipe Chicken dinner! Pass the hot sauce and napkins, MILF.

Tuesday, December 20, 2016

MILF on the Shelf: Day 8

Hey! Get out of my new blindingly gaudy running shoes, MILF! However, I got them a few weeks ago and have yet to even try them on since my feet are constantly swollen from work. If I remember my property class from law school correctly, since you've been living in them all this time, I guess they're now yours due to adverse possession. Shucks! Guess I'll have to buy another ugly pair.

Friday, December 16, 2016

Thursday, December 15, 2016

It's Christmas time in the city

Every year I buy a new ornament - okay, *at least* one new ornament - and here is this year's model. I figured it was pretty fitting given my new digs.

Monday, December 12, 2016

MILF on the Shelf: Day 5

I'm flattered by the offer to do my back, MILF, but you're paper and cardboard. The shower would kill you.

Sunday, December 11, 2016

The most wonderful race of the year!

It was a very frigid night, but I wouldn't miss the Tacky Light Run - my favorite race of the entire year - for anything. Unfortunately, I didn't think to stop and take too many snaps, so what you see is what you get.
This time my sister and her family joined me. A good time was had by all.
And I just realized I never made a post for last year's race, so here's a picture from then, with my buddy Suzanne:
Why can't every race have millions of tacky lights?

MILF on the Shelf: Day 4

Okay, MILF. I'll share my Sugar Shack. Just save me the eggnog custard filled one, okay?

Wednesday, December 7, 2016

Saturday, December 3, 2016

MILF on the Shelf: Day 2

Well, would you look at that, MILF? You won $5 to play with at the Amazon company canteen. Don't spend it all in one place and on junk you won't use! Oh, wait. It's only redeemable in one place and good for junk you won't use.

Friday, December 2, 2016

MILF on the Shelf: Day 1

You found my new digs, MILF! Don't worry. That welcome mat applies to everyone but you. And whoever is Ed McMahon's successor at Publishers Clearing House.

Sunday, January 10, 2016

Tuesday, December 29, 2015

Now, that's the best tastin' ornament I've ever hoid.

This year's new ornament: a Christmas pickle. Because why not? I'd first heard the story of the tradition on this episode of the Christmas Stocking Podcast​. Basically, the first child that finds the pickle on the tree gets an extra present. However, at present I don't have any kids to find my pickle. Um, maybe I should rephrase that...

Friday, December 25, 2015

F*** Violet Bick, marry Mary Hatch, kill Mr. Potter

I streamed midnight mass, imbibed my eggnog coffee, watered the tree, read the Christmas story, watched MST3K's Santa Claus and the Stephen Colbert special, wrapped presents, opened presents, explored the glorious depths of gluttony with the family, and emptied a bottle of Jacapple. Just one more thing to do before I put a bow on this whole Christmas thing. (Con: Too tired to go to the Byrd. Pro: My couch is more conducive to a long winter's nap than those seats.)

MILF on the Shelf: Day 6

Retreating into a bottle of Jacapple, MILF? See you next year! Maybe!

Thursday, December 24, 2015

Give me all the scotch and Yule logs you have.

Nick Offerman drinking scotch for 45 minutes. Drop the Yule log.

MILF on the Shelf: Day 5

MILF gave up most of her Christmas and all she got was this crummy t-shirt. And a $10 AmEx card. And a $5 Kroger gift card. And a sausage McMuffin. And two pizza lunches. And sugar cookies. And two Thanksgiving lunches. And a candy cane.

Wednesday, December 23, 2015

Tuesday, December 22, 2015

MILF on the Shelf: Day 3

MILF on the Shelf: Day 3. Aw, you're making me a traditional Christmas dinner. Thanks, MILF!

Sunday, December 20, 2015

Little full, lotta sap

The tree is finally fully decorated. It kind of overwhelms the room and there's no room for a star/angel, but I'm digging it. Go to any online resource and the basic rule of thumb is 100 lights per every foot of tree. Hogwash! I put 300 or 350 on this 8 footer and think it looks fine. Big Holiday Illumination must be behind those "helpful" guidelines.

And sure, it may be a little wild and unruly, but as with my afro I like to keep things natural.

A Very Micah Christmas 2015

It's been a different, much busier Christmas season for me this year. As such, I didn't have much time to devote to A Very Micah Christmas (or this blog, for that matter), but it's done! While I didn't put the usual blood, sweat, and eggnog into it that I normally do, I didn't half ass it either. I'll have you know I used *at least* three quarters of my ass.

So what's on tap for this year's edition? I'm glad you asked:

1. "This Year" - Tony Thaxton
2. "All I Want For Christmas Is You" - Samson Trinh & The Upper East Side Big Band with Laura Ann Singh
3. "Holiday P.D.A. (Underneath the Mistletoe)" - Matty Ride
4. "O Christmas Tree, O Christmas Tree" - Brooke Waggoner
5. "I Pray on Christmas" - Harry Connick, Jr.
6. "Hark! The Herald Angels Sing" - The Brian Setzer Orchestra
7. "Holiday in L.A." - Band of Merrymakers
8. "Christmas Is Coming" - The Muppets
9. "Christmas Pics" - Barenaked Ladies
10. "Like a Gift From God or Whatever" - Chris Farren with Jenny Owen Youngs
11. "Mistletoe" - American Youth
12. "Hanukkah Dance" - Woody Guthrie
13. "Christmas TV" - Slow Club
14. "Last Month of the Year" - The Blind Boys of Alabama
15. "My Favorite Things" - Shawn Lee's Ping Pong Orchestra
16. "New Year's Resolution" - Otis Redding & Carla Thomas
17. "Baby, It's Cold Outside" - Bill Murray & Jenny Lewis
18. "Winter Weather" - Joe Williams & Harry "Sweets" Edison
19. "Ding Dong! Merrily on High" - The George Shearing Quintet
20. "Boots" - The Killers
21. "The Song the Season Brings" - Beta Radio
22. "Mvmt IV, 'Every Bell on Earth Will Ring'" - The Oh Hellos
23. "Silent Night" - Odessa

You can snag it here.

But that's not all! If you act now you can stream (most of) it on Spotify:

Per usual, you're not getting the full experience there, what with it leaving out seven songs. But sometimes convenience trumps completeness.

And that's that about that. I hope you enjoy this year's mix. Merry Christmas! I'm going to take a nap now.

MILF on the Shelf: Day 2

MILF on the Shelf: Day 2. Silly, MILF. Get out of my locker. We don't have to work today!

Thursday, December 17, 2015

Ear warmers for me and my booze!

Maker's Mark still has the best Christmas swag in the business.

Monday, December 7, 2015

MILF on the Shelf: Day 1

MILF on the Shelf: Day 1. Well, look at that! MILF is my co-worker. (We carpool.) She, too, has barely enough time to sleep and eat, much less sprinkle MILF dust over slumbering teenage boys, so she may only make one or two other appearances this season.